I am fighting. I have been trying to keep my head above water for a long long time now and most of you know me as a lucky go happy all out there person with my bunny ears . I am struggling. It’s not easy to work 20 hours a day , 7 days a week. I never shut off or down and it is starting to leave its mark.
Also, It is a very tough “gig” being a fibre artist there can be discussions here there and everywhere by well meaning fellow artists saying we have to fight for a fair fibre wage but at the end of the day..every “gig” I do I pay I do not get paidor hardly get paid at all…and if I do, it hardly pays for fuel. I try to support a lot of people, helping them out when they ask me to do stuff and I do and I say YES ofcourse.. by either doing work for them or being part of events and getting people to support them and not getting paid myself. Yes, I cannot say no……..
Staying alive and paying the bills as an artist is very tough and it gets even tougher when you try and do the best you can and others who are doing it on the side as a hobby or who want to undercut or copy are surfacing and doing your head in.
It is doing my head in how a community and people who should be there for one another , are in fact, competing in stupid ways and hurting the community more than anything. This is a very hard discussion to have and what I am saying here is just the tip of the iceberg. Wait til you give up your day job and try and make a living off the art works you sell. Try. It is not hard.. it is very hard!! It is a tough world. Craft people should stick together and instead we get bombarded with people selling their work or “just” reselling UNDER the regular retail prices. Even if it is just 1 dollar, it makes a huge difference. In the 12 years I have been professionally trying to make a living selling my art or craft, it has actually gotten worse and worse and it is harder than ever.
When you see me at Bendigo or at any show, You see me but at the same time , it takes lots and lots of work and lots of effort. Every time I tell people I am actually very shy..they just laugh at me. I know people think I am this out going extrovert kind of person but .. really I am insecure, always doubting myself, quiet, introvert and very afraid. I have lived through some amazing bad SH*T and survived all my life, be it bullying, abuse, neglect, violence and total utter despair. And every time I hit that utter low at the bottom of a bottomless pit I have to fight.. I fight and I smile and I create. It is hard and tough but every time I have to realise and talk to myself that other people are doing it tougher than I am. I need time. I need to “re-group- to make my pain logical .. to make the struggle easier. I have been there before..and with hard work I know I can get out but I need time.
It’s not that I can take time off work. I can NOT STOP creating..I have to keep going… Creating is not the chore, it is trying to fight my mood, the feeling I have to help , the feeling I have to fight injustice, unfairness and by doing so, being unjust to myself..by not allowing myself even a day off. And yet… I do ….I have to….re group. This is a really hard blog to write because I am still working very very hard. The farm doesn’t stop…the bills come…promises have to be kept..always…and at the same time I realise that even when I was fighting cancer, I did not take any time off..never.. because I never thought that was an option…so I kept on going like an energiser bunny…and an energiser bunny I remain.
I will get out of this pit of despair..lol…I know I will,,because I am blessed with a good sense of humour and great coping mechanisms, but at the moment it is hard. I am doing it tough. It is just all a culmination of …stuff and very VERY hard work and ….stupid actions of others that I cannot fight because the actions of others are theirs not mine.
I have to learn to speak my mind if I have to, and not to let things get to me so much they break my heart. I will get there..I will get better.. I am still me..myself..but … I am just going through a rough patch. I think I need a holiday…
I should get hold of that Tardis and leave today and get back yesterday with a two week holiday under my belt and nobody would even realise I had been gone… I think somebody needs to invent that.
Have a fun weekend and please do not hesitate to contact me if you have any questions! You know me: I always love to enable! Custom spinning and dyeing and creating blends Please contact me: I am here to help .
Mulberry Silk Tops
New IxCHeL Club sign ups are open ..but only for another week OR until the spaces fill up and it’s totally getting very crowded!
for the months : October, November and December 2016
(til quotas are reached or until October 1st)
IxCHeL Fibre Club October, November and December 2016
The IxCHeL Sock Yarn Clubs October, November and December 2016
IxCHeL Funky Bunny Batt Clubs October , November and December 2016
Dates to put in your Calendar !!
2nd of October
Black n Coloured Sheep FIELD DAY in Cranbourne!
Just contact me with the name of the colour you are after and I will get right back to you.
How To Order:
2. Message me on facebook or
3. Message me on www.ravelry.com where I am Ixchelbunny.
I will email you right back with all your order details and payment methods.
Any questions? Any custom orders for yarn or dyeing fibre? : Please don’t hesitate to ask! Always happy to enable.